


On the subject of burying me...

by nylon_serenade



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: AU where MCR didn't happen/hasn't happened, Angst, Death, Frank is also traumatized, Frank is his well-meaning friend, Frerard almost happened, Gerard is an unpublished writer and a bit of a hermit, Pining, all sad no fun, angst all the way down
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:48:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25961602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nylon_serenade/pseuds/nylon_serenade
Summary: Gerard is dying and wants to end things on his own terms. So he asks his good friend, Frank to bury him at the end of it.Frank has now to deal with the death of his friend and his the feelings he has pushed to the side for so long.
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way, Gerard Way/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: I do wish for this to be interpreted as a hypothesis of anything that may have happened between the members of my chemical romance, all of this is:  
> -Fictional.  
> -An AU that has almost nothing to do with MCR in itself as a band.  
> -A piece of experimental fiction written in part for therapeutic reasons.
> 
> This is a bit of an experimental work/drabble based (VERY METAPHORICALLY) on stuff that happened to me earlier in the year. I also made a song regarding this and may link it here if anyone wants.

“Frank…”

Frank looked up from his mug, the coffee was going cold but he already felt nauseous from too much caffeine in the past few days

“Frank we need to talk about this…”

Frank didn’t want to talk about this, he knew it was coming but if maybe he could stave off the inevitable-

“Frank I”m going to die.”

Frank took a moment to breath then look up at his friend.

“And I want you to bury me.”

The words placed infront of him as if the man facing him had just asked him to help him with groceries, or to pass him the coffee pot on the other side of the table, but he knew it was much more than that.

“Gerard I…”

He was holding back tears at this point

“Please.”

Frank breathed in again pushing his emotions aside, at this point it was habitual for him to do so. He looked up again.

“I can’t really ask anyone else to do this for me…”`

“What about Matt?”

“Ah uhhh look, Matt’s a great friend but he’s unreliable and quite immature at times. I know he’s not gonna take the news from me well…”

“Understood.”

"So you'll do it?"

"Yeah, I will"

Gerard smiled. Frank smiled back, despite the growing feeling of his throat tightening.


	2. Chapter 2

He had a month.

Gerard had just texted him and Frank had a month left before his friend died.

Gerard wanted to finish things on his own terms but it was becoming too much for Frank to deal with, every time it crept back into his thoughts his throat felt like it was being stuffed with old wet rags and food that had long since expired.

And yet he persisted.

If Gerard was so insistant in his final days Frank felt a need to be by his side, despite the voice in his head that kept screaming at him for being so indulgent to someone who had failed to understand his feelings on so many occasions.

He wanted to cry

He wanted to sob, to scream at the world that had failed him, that had presented him with something he so loved so dearly only to tell him he could never have it then take it away just as it had appeared.

He wanted to unleash his anger on Gerard for ignoring his advances and stringing him along on only to then push him aside. For knowing exactly what he was doing when he dropped Frank in hopes of pursuing a woman he had just met.

Having a family.

Being ‘normal’.

Frank couldn’t ever be ‘normal’ and he hated how much Gerard seemed to like the idea.

Maybe it was jealousy.

But then again maybe he was just right, seeing so many people around him try to fit molds that were designed to keep them out only to hurt themselves in the process had left him disillusioned. ‘Normality’ only worked for a select, privileged elite who had the good sense to be born well-off, mentally stable and most certainly had the good sense to not be hurt by how the world treated them.

Crying wouldn’t do him any good now though, he wasn’t home yet.

And he could rarely bring himself to cry in public.

It was much better in dark corners.

Where no one could see.

No one could slap the bottle out of his hands, or berate and scream at the boy who couldn’t keep himself together after being spit on.

Or mocked.

Or beaten.

He finally got to his door, his face was half frozen from the autumn wind and he wasn’t sure if his nose was running because of the cold or the feeling in his throat and behind his eyes.

He finally collapsed in his room and sobbed.

He had a month.


	3. Chapter 3

He woke up in a cold sweat.

Getting to sleep was already a chore and waking up again because of the nightmares only made Frank feel more desperate. For every night in the past few days, sleeping had become a chore, the feeling in his throat had long since colonized his stomach leaving all his guts feeling twisted in unnatural and incomprehensible ways.

Then there were the nightmares.

Sometimes he could barely remember the half formed shapes of whatever stalked his mind while he slept.

Of the impossible places and the esoteric speeches.

Of the worlds between worlds and the words that constantly shifted.

Of the screams…

Were there really that many screams or had his memory tinted whatever was left red ?

Oh but he remembered the feelings...

The sinking feeling when he remembered there was only weeks left before he lost his closest friend.

The anger he felt when he kept thinking of their history.

Of the time Gerard almost left the state in pursuit of someone who barely gave him a second glance.

The time he drunkenly promised Frank the world only to then wake up the next day and forgotten all his sweet words.

The coffee date Gerard had sworn they would go on.

The trip to the arcade that now wouldn't happen…

Gerard would die.

And Frank wouldn't have the heart to go to the famed 'Rack n' Roll' on his own.  
  
Rack n' Roll would eventually close.

And so would all the other places Gerard was rumored to frequent.

Even the places he haunted would become but memories to those who haunted it themselves.

He tried to roll over and sleep again.

It didn’t work. Later he had to wake up and bring his guitar over to Gerard’s house so they could play music together.

He loved Gerard’s voice…

It was so…

Particular.

No one he knew had a voice like that, it was melodious but could be so harsh.  
  
God Gerard could could scream when he wanted to...

He woke up again.

The sun was finally out.


End file.
